I play a song, to calm me down and hide away my pain.




I hate the pain of rejection, I hate the feeling of being let down.
Im scared your going to hurt me one day for doing something wrong then what do I do. I dont wanna leave but that could end up being my only choice one day. I can't stay forever. I love being here, but I need to grow up and move on, get out in the world when im old enough but still young enough. I dont want you to feel that I dont love you or dont need you when im independent. I need you I have already lost part of one. Im growing up im not a little baby anymore I rather you treat me my age then a five year old. It hurts to see you have not much trust for me.
Im scared to leave one day, but I need to see what the real world has planned for me.
Il get no where if I dont learn how to grow up one day.
Loveyou forever, never forget

Hard enough to find harder to move on

I found you,
the perfect one,
the sweet one, the one who is really nice, the one who is clean and cute.
You seemed to be perfect in my eyes, I thought you were different.
I thought you were the one,
Obviously i was wrong.
You lead me on and drop me like a bad habit, your just like the rest of them
total ass hole.
I really liked you. you were hard to find the one who i thought was perfect was so hard to find i found you now I find out who you really are.
It was hard enough to get past the stuff people said about you to me. Also people telling me not to go after you but I did and they were right, i shouldn't of.
Now I got hurt, but i started to move on, i was almost over you till you pull me back in. Now I'm sick of you can't stand the sound of your voice, that's not what i wanted but that's what i got.

I'm done with you, that was not easy

2010, a new year with new problems.

This year is going to be fun.

Everyone thinks a new year should be better then the last, well i doesnt work like that. You always get new problem's maybe for you it doesnt come as fast. But my problem's have started already this new year. Some old problems followed me into the new year, thats what i wanna fix this year. I always want everything just to blow over and be solved just by me leaving it or saying sorry. But I realized Im in highschool it doesnt work like that anymore. Saying sorry making up noo not a chance. People getting other people into it and its all one big fight. One of my main resolutions is trying not to let anything bother me, obviously things will but i will keep it to myself and try to slove it. If that doesnt work il talk to someone close to me. This New year is the start of just another year full of drama. But hopefully it will be better then the last.

Get ready,get set,go

top 10 resolutions

10.Get a better job

9.Go on a family trip and spend some more time with my family

8.Lose 10-20 pounds with the help of my bestfriend

7. listen to my dad and save up money for a car

6. try not to lose anyfriends and get more

5.REDO my ugly pink room

4.Change my life around

3.Helping others

2.not let others push me around and into things i dont want to do

1.Have a great year and try to make it better not just for me but for everyone around me.